(Some side-effects of thinking)
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I’ve heard it said that “Art imitates Life.” That may be true, although I’ve met Art, and he doesn’t really seem the type.

And then sometimes, Life imitates Art … usually, badly. For example, some social media addicts have bought into the idea that if something online is “trending,” that automatically means it’s “important.” Or, if some comment or article or video or chronic stupidity is “going viral,” people have convinced themselves that, without challenge, it is worth your immediate attention.

But art, particularly TV and movies … assuming you can call TV “art” … can be full of pot holes. Lapses in continuity, or logic, or even basic facts, that can strain your ability to believe, as if you took the family went to the theatre to watch a used car commercial.

So what if, when you take a minute to actually ponder something online that’s “trending,” it turns out to be bunk, or inconsistent, or causes you to have one of those “Hey, wait a minute!” minutes?

Step carefully. It could be a real-life plot hole. Like these…

Star Wars

The Ewoks of Endor, a furry species that were basically just armed teddy bears, somehow managed to wreak havoc against huge, armored Galactic stormtroopers. Ewoks, like many cartoon characters from my childhood, tended to wear hats or jackets but no pants, so maybe they just embarrassed the stormtroopers to death.

In one of the several dozen movies, Jabba the Hut appears on one planet when the previous story line puts him on a different planet. Even more bizarre, there are Star Wars fanatics who actually got upset about that.

According to insider sources, creator George Lucas meant “Darth Vader” to imply “dark father,” as if George had a speech impediment, like that other well-known evil, hat-wearing hunter, Darth Fudd. (Star Wars VIII: Wevenge of the Wascally Wabbit)

Beyond Darth Vader, there were actually a lot of Darths in the movie franchise – Darth Bane, Darth Maul, Darth Sidious, who promoted Tommy “Lord” Vader from a Darth undergrad to a full-on Darth, Darth Brooks (a country music singer), and Darth Shadows, who went on to star in a TV show about a vampire with bad hair.

So who was Luke’s mother?

All In The Family

According to people who write trivia questions for a living, the first time anyone watching television ever heard the sound of a toilet flushing was during an episode of All In The Family. And Archie Bunker was a bigot that we laughed at (and with). This was a kinder, gentler time, when people had indoor plumbing and a sense of humor.

The Lord of the Rings

The hobbits were the hippies of Middle Earth. Long hair, smoked pipe weed, loved flowers, preferred peace, went barefoot. One time, they nearly got caught by bad guys while trying to collect mushrooms.

Frodo and Sam went through hell, and Seattle, in order to hike to and walk through Mordor, but they finally escaped from Mount Doom on the backs of giant eagles. Why didn’t they just ride the giant eagles in to Mordor?

The Matrix

Why didn’t the red pill turn Neo into a Republican? Or at the very least, a neo-conservative?

Star Trek

I’ve been watching this show since 1966, and have yet to see anyone go to the bathroom. Heck, Archie and Edith Bunker had figured out that trick centuries ago.

It also took several decades before one of the show’s writers finally had someone look at Spock and ask, “Have you lost your Vulcan mind?”

And why does the Enterprise, a starship that travels at multiples of the speed of light, have windows?

In any episode, you could always spot the extras in the cast. They were the guys waiting in the transporter to “beam down” wearing red shirts.

Just before trouble started, someone always instructed, “Phasers on stun.” Nobody ever gave orders to set phasers on “kill” or “vaporize” or “create big holes.” One time, the crew of the Enterprise was fighting a large, living rock. Still, “Phasers on stun.”

I’m not saying that Captain Kirk was a horndog, but he once hit on a green woman. That’s just wrong. If your date is green, she’s either way too young or way too old.

Due to the Vulcan ritual of pon farr, Spock only had sex once every seven years. Now we know why he never smiled.

The Star Trek universe had plenty of binary stars, but only one non-binary star. Its name was Miley Cyrus. It couldn’t sing, either.

And why are there still shuttles and space walks in the “star date” future generations? Why don’t they just use the transporter? (or borrow Frodo’s eagles)

Comments from Star Fleet Academy cadets, on getting their first commission:
Officer: Cadet, here’s your phaser.
Cadet: Thank you, sir.
Officer: Here’re your gravity boots.
Cadet: Cool.
Officer: Here’s your red shirt.
Cadet: Oh, crap.