- Reviews were mixed for Kraft’s new product, Macaroni & Head Cheese
- “It’s not the child’s fault,” countered the social worker. “He was raised near a nuclear reactor.”
- Tensions mounted as the world leaders insisted on separate checks
- “No,” barked NSA lead John Bolton. “The protective head shield stays.”
- “Again with the ‘finish your vegetables or Europe walks’ threat,” sighed the Japanese spokesman.
- History tells us precious little about CSPAN’s failed reboot, “Guess Who’s Coming To Dinner?”
- “Look, Angela,” challenged the auditioning director. “Hillary’s pantsuit and David Spade’s haircut is just not the look we’re after.”
- Negotiations stalled as the American leader insisted he had to “go wee-wee.”
- The Italian ambassador checked his notes while the Olive Garden maitre d’ pressed her case: “So, you claim your salad was NOT endless?”
- Tonight on CNN! President Trump sits on a small Italian child!